Reminiscence
by MiDnIgHt525
Summary: The untold story about Alice's human life. The story that she lied about, and the life that she wanted to forget.
1. Prolouge

I'd kiss thee ere I kill thee: no way but this, Killing myself, to die upon a kiss.

-Othello, act 5 scene 2

To think one act would change my life so differently. Life was so full surprises, and so was my future. I felt a small fire again at the nape of my neck. It was getting hotter and hotter, spreading to my arms and legs. However I couldn't cry. Though it burned so, my mind only my future. Again, and again...

I whimpered, pulling my arms closer to my legs. Closing my eyes, I blocked myself from the oncoming future. To drown in the darkness that was surrounding me. To escape from reality. For what I was going threw was nothing of it.

However, was it such a sin to not regret it?


	2. Jack O’Conner Bohlen McCray

I'd kiss thee ere I kill thee: no way but this, Killing myself, to die upon a kiss.

-Othello, act 5 scene 2

To think one act would change my life so differently. Life was so full surprises, and so was my future. I felt a small fire again at the nape of my neck. It was getting hotter and hotter, spreading to my arms and legs. However I couldn't cry. Though it burned so, my mind only my future. Again, and again...

I whimpered, pulling my arms closer to my legs. Closing my eyes, I blocked myself from the oncoming future. To drown in the darkness that was surrounding me. To escape from reality. For what I was going threw was nothing of it.

However, was it such a sin to not regret it?

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It was cold.. I could hear the wind against my window. I had been in this asylum for more than a few years, yet I could never find comfort from it. It was always wet, dark, and cold, but we were never provided enough to prepare for this weather. I pulled my thin blanket closer to myself. It had been a long time since I had seen civilization. The others here were all just half out of their mind. Kids that hallucinated, heard things, felt things unreal.... Or for my case saw things. Since I was a young girl, I could see things that would happen further from now. Yet it was such a sin and I was kicked into this ward, fit for mentally sick (or crazy) people, unlike me. My family was against me, never even sending one letter. They were ashamed of me, afraid of what others would think.. I was slowly erased from the family picture, as if I was never there. We'd be strangers by now if they hadn't paid every few months for the asylum. I sighed and rapped my blanket tighter around me, falling into my past memory.

I started having my first vision when I was about 11. It wasn't very clear or long. I saw that we'd have turkey for dinner, which was my favorite. Too young to know what would happen, I ran to my mother excited about our upcoming feast. However she looked a bit shocked for she had just made the decision at that moment. Feeling a bit uneasy about her reaction, I just said that I got a lucky guess, and ran up to my room. From that day on, I started a diary where I recorded all my visions. Images of presents, homework, everyday menus... It went on for about 2 years and a half when Alexandra, my big sister found it. I was back from helping my mother when she cornered me in my room.

"What is going on?" she hissed.

"What do you mean?"

"This," she said, while she took out my diary.

I reached out for diary, "Give it back!"

"This is bad luck...." she said while shaking her head..

Afraid of what would happen to me I asked if she would tell our mom.

"No, I won't tell mom. I don't know what might happen to you if I do." Alex said, putting on a half smile.

"Tell me what?"

That second I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand. I slowly turned around, to see my mother eying us suspiciously. She saw my diary which had dropped out of my hand in surprise. While arching her eyebrow, she took it up and read a random page. I slowly felt tears collecting at my eyes, at the change of her expression.

"Alex..Alice, w-what is this?"

Nobody could answer her because we didn't know how. It was too much for Alex's or my age at that time. Too much for us to think, too much for us to handle in our own hands.

"Alice.. did.. did you write this? Please tell me that these are all make up stories? You really can't see visions, right?" No... that is the sign of the devil!"

My mother's face went pale. It seemed as if she was talking to herself more than she was talking to us. And without an explanation, she took me down to the town priest. At that rate, I was sobbing hard, afraid of what would happen to myself. I was scared and nervous. Words could not explain how queasy I felt. When my mother explained our situation, brother Nicholas(the priest) gave me some kind of ritual that was believed to drive out all the demons from my body. I was soaked in holly water again and again, and have my body covered with flowers that were known to agonize bad souls. Then with a needle they pricked my neck, believing that the small hole would be a way out for the demons. It hurt, but it didn't hurt as much as my heartfelt. I felt betrayed, furious, and mournful that my mother was letting this man do this to me. Weren't families a relation that protected others? Was it really true that she was doing this to me for she loved me?

At home my father and mother fought over dinner, whether they should send me to an asylum. I tried many times to budge into the talk and say that I was fine, but my parents acted as if I were not there. In the end my father decided that I needed treatment. However I do think that they just didn't't want a crazy daughter. My aunt put quite a fight, but in the end, nothing could change my future. I knew, since I saw it in a vision. Me, screaming, while the doctors and others took me away. I could see Alex mouthing to me that she was sorry. After that, the only people I see now are the workers around here. It sucks, but I can't be picky can I...

That moment, I heard the door open.

"Erm.... Alice....?"

A young man with blonde hair poked his head in. I could see that he looked very timid by the way he kept on swallowing and looking around. I jumped up out of bed.

"I'm Alice. Who are _you_?" I asked as I arched an eyebrow.

"Umm. I'm your new care taker. Christy had to go back home because of a personal reason."

He had a cute smile. However I could see that his corners were slightly quivering- nervous I supposed. I let out a small laugh. It seemed unreal....unnatural for me to form a tinkling sound. It had been ages since I had let out even a giggle. Nothing was actually satisfying enough for me to smile.

"Good to meet you. You seem to be nervous though. Don't worry. I didn't come in here because I murdered anyone" I said. "Well at least any I know about" I added with a small giggle.

I could see that he was getting comfortable by the second. I too had never been so jolly in my life. I felt new. I felt whole. It was good to feel that a person was starting to open his heart and think of you as a human, not someone who went an asylum since they were thought to be out of their mind. I felt....trusted...and....loved.

"What is your name?"

"Well… it's a bit long. My full name is Jack O'Conner Bohlen McCray.

I let out a small laugh though I quickly sobered up since I knew I was being rude to a person I only met 30 minutes ago.

"Oh go on. You can laugh. Jack's my name, O'Conner Bohlen was my grandfather's name, and McCray is my last name. You can just call me Jack, just like my other friends call me."

I felt my heart quickening at the word, "friend"

Was I truly that kind of person to him?

For the rest of the morning we talked about each other's life. I found in common that we both didn't't have such good memories about our families. Jack had a rough relationship with his father and brother after his mother died from tuberculosis when he was 10. He was often beaten and badly treated. Then his father committed suicide by diving into the sea after that his brother disappeared. He had been living on his own ever since for 8 years. He was currently 20.

I took a closer look at his face. It was pale, almost white and you could see his firm jaw line. His eyes were black, almost as dark as coal. He was also very fit for a 20 year old, and he was at least a feet taller than me. …. He was just.. beautiful. I wondered why I never had a vision about him coming.

"Alice dear, I think we shall be great friends."

I had a small smile on my face as an agreement.


End file.
